The Blog is Back, Alright!

In 2012, I wrote 14 blog posts. 

In 2013, I wrote 11 blog posts. 

In 2014, I wrote 6 blog posts. 

And I haven't blogged since July. 

Guys – this makes me sad. It certainly isn't that I haven't had anything to write about. 2014 was an amazing year of engagements, weddings, vacations, friends, family, a big move, and a new job! It was fun – and you'll have to trust me, because 6 blogs hardly did the year justice. 

This year, I am going to try and document all of the things that happen to me in 2015: The Good, The Bad, and the Ugly (because sometimes selfies are not my best angle). I can feel the excitement from you readers growing as I type this. "OMG she is back!!" Look out blogger community! 

So what will my first blog be about? Such suspense! Well, no need to anticipate the content – you are reading it right now. This is my first blog back. Get with it. 

But soon there will be new, wonderful, witty blogs for you to enjoy. In the meantime, I will leave you with a few pics from 2014…enjoy! 

Putting the Love in Lovegren

He made this. 

When I posted a few months ago that 2013 was not a very good year, some of my friends found it a little offensive. Chad, however, found it VERY offensive. For some reason he does not feel he gets enough facetime in this blog (which he only reads because I make him) so this Valentine’s Day, I am writing about Chad. And since he is a tad narcissistic like me, I think he will like this.

WARNING: This is a cheesy post, so if you like cheese (wait - everyone likes cheese, but you know what I mean) then read on. If not, then go enjoy your afternoon, and I promise I will post again soon.

As most of you know, Chad and I met online and for some reason he instantly made me happy. His eharms questions were about Saved By The Bell, he went in for the kiss on a first date, and made Dad Jokes that made me smile from ear to ear. He paid attention to everything I said (which I can only imagine is not easy) and still continues to surprise me how well he can listen to even my longest stories. And while Chad is overall good on paper – funny, handsome, creative, thoughtful – it is the little things about him that made me fall in love with him. 

Here are just a few of my favorite Chad moments:

On one of our first dates, Chad and I went to the beach. He was in charge of the cocktails, and I was in charge of the food. That morning, Chad went for a 16-mile run before making some strong cocktails to bring to my house. Being that I was nervous to be seen in a bathing suit for the first time, I completely forgot about the fact that I was in charge of food. He never said anything, so we went to the beach and started casually drinking our cocktails. By the time we finished, Chad was not only drunk, but STARVING. He stayed quiet until we went to the Sox game that night, and he inhaled almost an entire helmet nacho (I helped). People were like, “Woa, I have never seen anyone actually finish one of those.” It took months before he ever told me how hungry he was that day, and reminded me that I was in charge of the food. Whoops. But the fact that he ate the helmet nachos and kept the helmet, well – I knew he was a keeper right then and there.

This year was Chad’s first year at the lake, and it is no surprise that he loved it. But more than Chad loved the lake, I think my dad loved having another man up there to help him and Keith with some labor around the house. Trying to get on Bob Keller’s good side, Chad helped my dad put rocks up and down the shoreline to build a rock wall. The next day, when all the rocks had fallen (Keith’s side), Chad rebuilt the rock wall. The next day, when the rocks fell again (Dad’s side), Chad rebuilt a third time. I know throwing 25 pound rocks isn’t exactly how he planned to spend his weekend, but the fact the he got in the water each day to build something for my family made me love him a little bit more.

Every once in a while I get the chance to work from home, and when I do, I often work from Chad’s house. He and I only see each other about 1 or 2 days a week, so working from home opens up the possibility of a 3^rd day. I usually tell Chad when I am heading to his house (just so he knows) and about 75% of the time he responds to tell me what food is in the house. I can’t tell if it is his way of keeping track of how much I eat when I get there, or just because he knows that I am always hungry, but for some reason it always cracks me up. Sidenote: the food is always the same – Cottage Cheese, Pizza Rolls, Apples, and sometimes leftover chicken. The other 25% of the time he tells me that “if I am cold/hot, I can adjust the temperature” and then gives directions on how to use the thermostat. Pressing the up/down button can be tough, especially when you have you’re busy eating pizza rolls.

I am not going to put you through anymore of my sappy tales, but this is just a snapshot into why I love this guy. While I know these stories don’t mean anything to any of you readers, they mean the world to me.

I feel very lucky to have found you, Chad. Happy Valentine’s Day!

I've seen it all in a small town...Had myself a ball in a small town

You have read in my last few posts how much I love the summers in Chicago. The funny thing is that my favorite thing about summer actually has nothing to do with this great city. My favorite city during the summer is actually Rome: A well-known, historic and beautiful city in Italy Wisconsin.

Doesn't that look relaxing?

Yes – Rome, Wisconsin is truly one of my favorite cities in the world. Wait, who am I kidding – Rome isn’t a city at all! It is a small unincorporated town in Central Wisconsin (about 40 miles north of the Dells) where I have had more experiences and stories than I can even remember. The town doesn’t have a post-office or a zip code, but it is home to 3 man-made lakes (Sherwood, Camelot and Arrowhead), one corner store (Pritzel’s) and 4 bars. My family bought a house on Lake Sherwood in 1983, and this summer marked the 30^th anniversary of “The Lake.” 

Being about 3 ½ hours from where I grew up, we spent all of our summers up at the lake. We would pack up “The Beast” (our blue conversion van – complete with velvet curtains) and leave a few days after school ended, returning with only enough time to hit up Woodfield before the first day of school. We would spend all day out on the boat swimming, skiing and tubing, and nights would consist of ski practice, ski shows, bonfires and pontoon rides.

Ski Practice and Ski Shows? You probably all know this, but my sisters and I were on a waterski team growing up called Shermalot. People always think this is really strange (especially people from the South) but show-skiing is actually huge in the Midwest, and Wisconsin is the Show-Ski Capital of the World! Yes, Wisconsin, where you can only ski from Memorial Day to Labor Day is actually home to some of the best show-skiers on this great planet. Being on the ski team gave us life-long friendships and teenage romances, taught us that life is not always fair, and mostly gave us an outlet to be ourselves. 

An old Shermalot Video - Look for Pam and Kim!

A list of things I love about the lake house/interesting facts – in no particular order.

• I met my best friend in the whole world, Carreen, at the lake 21 years ago. Though we were very different in size, we were both on the ski team and both wanting desperately to be cool (let’s be honest, Carreen). When we found out that we lived within 20 minutes of each other back in Illinois, we knew that our friendship was meant to be! Another fun fact – Carreen was the top of the 4-high pyramid growing up. Isn’t awesome?!?!
• I was at the lake house for Princess Diana and Michael Jackson’s funerals and watched both on TV.
• The Schmelters would spend every summer with us at the lake, and fell so in love that they had a house of their own across the lake for a few years.
• In the winters, we (Kellers and Schmelters) would often go to the lake the week between Christmas and New Years and walk across the frozen lake when our parents were too busy snowmobiling to drive us to friends’ houses. “Busy snowmobiling” in that sentence could also be replaced with “way too sauced.”
• We were at the lake when the Bulls 3-Peated and painted “Go Bulls” on our butts and tee-peed our Wisconsin friends’ houses. Because the lake is classy like that.
• I had my first beer, my first cigarette and my first kiss at the lake.
• I broke my nose at the lake after Kim ran over me with a wave-runner. Those things are dangerous.
• Drunk tubing with Carreen is one of my favorite past-times.
• The stars at the lake are IN-SANE. Literally, there are thousands of stars and almost every night you can see constellations, the Milky Way, and often catch a shooting star (although I have never been able to put it in my pocket).
• For years, our hot water heater would only produce 5-10 minutes worth of hot water each day. In efforts to give everyone at least 1-2 minutes of a hot shower, we would often shave our legs in the lake, shower in two’s, and always try to get in the shower before Kim (water-hog).    
• Patriotism is not optional at the lake. The 4th of July is a 3-4 day celebration complete with hot dogs, fireworks, a ski show, and lots of flair. Exactly how the 4th of July should be.
• Bunk Beds are only comfortable until the age of 16…unless you’re Christy Kremer.
• Boozing at the lake is pretty much not optional. Even when you say you are going to have a relaxing weekend with no partying, somehow you always have at least a few glasses of wine.
• Pizza Fries are ah-maze, and you can only get them at the lake. You’re just going to have to trust me on this.  
• At the lake, Bob Keller turns into a musical genius, singing the words to every song and playing his guitar like a boss. Ok, so he THINKS he turns into a musical genius – Bud Light and red wine will do it to ya. But he always keeps the party going, especially when he sings our favorite song from when we were little. This gem brings back memories of dancing to my dad’s guitar at the age of 3. “Please don’t burn the shithouse down, we worked so goddamn hard. Please don’t burn the shithouse down, we’ll have to use the yard.” It’s practically a classic.
• You can go anywhere in town in a bathing suit or pajamas. It’s amazing.
• One thing about the lake house is that it puts a curse on Keller girl relationships. Every time that we have brought a boyfriend or husband to the lake, the relationship has ended within 2 months. No one can really explain why, but my guess is that guys see what the Kellers are really like, and they just can’t hang. Keith and Chad (so far) have been the only exceptions to this rule.
• Sleeping on a cot on the porch is a privilege – that’s where all the cool kids hang out.
• One of the 4 bars at the lake “Trails End” in the last few years has gone from our least favorite bar on the lake, to our most favorite. They went through a huge renovation about 5 years ago and now is a favorite for a few reasons (yes, this is a list within a list): 1) Huge outside bar with bags tournaments. 2) Live music who always welcomes me up on stage for crowd-hyping. 3) Their Bloody Mary has a SLIDER on top. I mean, come on. 4) The most important thing…they have a bus (“The Drunk Bus”) that will pick you up and take you home from anywhere in town. While the driver is usually about 15 years old and/or a little buzzed himself, it always makes for a good time.
• If you need to find Larry, he is always hanging out in the garage…or on the drunk bus.

I am sure many of you have that special place where you know the smells and sounds by heart, and they instantly bring back memories further back than you can imagine. To me, that is “The Lake.” 

Lots of anniversaries at the lake this year!
Mike and Jenny celebrating meeting at the lake 10 years ago!

Our 21st anniversary at the lake - watching the ski show where it all began!

Some of the Keller Fam - 30th anniversary of the lake!

Ok, not everyone gets to drink at the lake.
Pam and Pants boat-watching (exciting!)

Told you the Lake is very patriotic! The girls on the 4th of July

Papa, Na and Autumn cruising

Patriotism at its finest. 

Captain America has patriotism built right into his name. 

Junior High - Yikes.

Aww..He once looked up to me

After my “baby Love” post, NotInMod readers (ok, reader…singular) pointed out that my nephew, Cameron, was not getting adequate press time. Unrelated sidenote: Rachel, thank you for reading. 

Cameron is my 12-year-old nephew who I love very much. I am convinced he loves me too, although his actions make that debatable. Maybe he senses that I know nothing about 12-year-old boys, and if so, he is very right. I didn’t even know about 12-year-old boys when I was a 12-year-old. #singlepreteen



I think this shirt is really funny. Look at him - he's a heartbreaker!

Here are a few things I know about my nephew:

• His birthday is May 30, 2000 and he will be 13 next month.
• He used to play the clarinet, but he recently traded that in for a miniature tuba. BTW – a miniature tuba is not called a tuba. I don’t remember what it’s called, but I do know that it’s heavy.
• He is in wrestling and he is REALLY good. Do not let his size fool you – that kid is a fighter. He obviously takes after his mothers and aunts, who used to practice women’s wrestling on our parents’ king size bed growing up. It wasn’t as weird as it sounds, I swear…
• He is hilarious - also takes after his aunts (sorry, Kim)
• He is very into Black Opps and gaming, two things I know close to nothing about. 
• He is one of those super smart kids that gets bored really easily because they are usually a step ahead of everyone. Especially ahead of his family after we've had a few cocktails.
• He tries to hide it, but that kid is FULL of love. I have a feeling he is secretly a hugger like me.
• He thinks I am incredibly lame.

In an effort to try to be a better aunt to Cameron, I wanted to tap into what it was like when I was his age. My life at Plum Grove Junior High (we called it SCUM Grove – great pun) was really quite pathetic. I was obsessed with Titanic, the Spice Girls and ‘NSync. My weekends consisted of following my sisters around, drinking too much Mountain Dew and making up dances with Carreen. I lived in fear of getting my period at school and often had a sweatshirt tied around my waist. I was caught cheating on the pig dissection exam in 7^th grade, and cried more than most people cry in a lifetime.  



Carrie Keller - age 12
Yikes.



And like all girls in junior high, I wanted SO desperately to be cool. I remember letting a popular girl see my science project, and when she cheated off of me, I took the blame. I got in trouble for hitting kids with seatbelts on bus because that’s what the cool kids in the back of the bus were doing. And worst of all, I remember making fun of a kid for not having any friends, when I actually sort of wanted to be his friend.

I don’t remember if I was nasty to my parents when I was in junior high, but I suspect that I was. I am sure that I being friends with my aunts and uncles sounded like a lame thing to do when I would rather spend time with the few friends I had. So in retrospect, I don’t think I can blame Cameron for not wanting to open up to me. If I thought I had it hard, kids these days have way more to deal with. I read something the other day that said 6 out of 10 girls stop doing what they love because they are too self-conscious. And when I watch the news and hear the horror stories about bullying, I can understand why. It is a tough world out there, and I am sure that most 12-year-old boys don’t want to turn to their aunt (no matter how insightful she may think she is) and open up.  

So I can’t take it too personally when he tells me I am boring. I just need to remember what a great kid he is, and have hope that one day he will turn around and think I am great too.



Start spreadin' the News...I'm leavin' today.

Today is my last day at News America Marketing. It is the end of an era.

First and Last Sales Summit.

I have worked at News America since September 11, 2006. I remember driving into the office on my first day and listening to 9/11 memorial coverage and crying….no surprise, I was also running late. I am sure I made quite the first impression. 

Most people think that my time at News was spent as a slave to Dollar General and Walgreens. And while that was certainly true on some days, there were times that the hardest part of my day was deciding between which two pairs of boots to buy (odds are I bought both) or choosing where to go to lunch (so many options in the pedway). But regardless, it balanced itself to be all-in-all a pretty good gig.

MCo - My bestie and fave NAMer of all time.

But the thing about News that I thankful for is the friends I have met while I was here. Some of my very best friends I have met through News and I will thank Uncle Rup for that every day. Actually, I should probably thank Melissa Cohen, without whom I would NEVER have gotten this (or maybe any) job after college. “I’m so good at interviewing” was one of my fave lines in college. Guess what? I was not.   

I am totes obsessed with these girls.

I realized today that I have spent more time with in my NAM chapter than with any other chapter in my life. More time than college, more than high school. And I learned a lot here…Maybe more than college, more than high school…nevermind, that’s a ridiculous statement.

But really, News has been a great first chapter in my life and I am walking away with few bad things to say and plenty of great memories. Cheers to the next chapter! 

This is when I made Alaina drive 10 hours to Memphis with me.
Have you ever heard of a little account called Pictsweet?

Another sales summit - these girls were some of my favorites in Atlanta

NAMers love festivals - Nadine and Nick and me!

We started and ended our time at NAM within weeks of each other. 

Sarah - not a long time NAMer, but always made us laugh! 

Christmas Party in NYC - back when Rup spoiled us. 

Another Christmas party - only one of these girls still works at NAM. Woa.

This is a terrible picture, but I had to put it in. Trade Rally-ers.

Concert at Lakewood, likely about an hour before blacking out.

These guys....I have no words. 

One of my favorite people ever.
This girl has as much love for others as she has holes in her clothes. 

NAMers at festivals - per the us.

My going away party to Chicago. Who would I miss?? That girl!

If I have to walk 60 miles, I am glad I got to do it with this gem.

Oh, just another Chicago team event that ended in blacking out.

Ride the Rail....nothing else to say.

One of my fave ACs ever.
She even came to one of my parties, which is more than I can say for any other NAMers.

Look at these girls!! After my sake-bomb going away party.
I went out with a bomb.